Over the last year I have been trying to figure out why my motivation for writing has been lacking. I could remember when I wrote everyday. I remember feeling like I didn’t have the choice but to write. I would write no matter what had gone on throughout the day. I never was too tired, or too preoccupied.
Over the last year that feeling has been gone. I have been trying to desperately figure out where it went. I thought at first it was because I spent so much time looking for a job, then I had multiple jobs. I put it all off as being too tired. I was not just physically tired but mentally as well. I was trying so hard during the day to prove myself, to show that I was worth hiring into a full time position that I used up all my motivation and strength. There was nothing left for me.
Then at the end of last year I was offered a full time position at one of my jobs. I took it with excitement. It was exactly what I had been hoping would happen from the start of my journey. I thought, “Perfect, that worry is now gone. I can pay my bills doing a job I love.”
I thought my writing motivation would come back in a flood. My weary mind had room to do something else now. But that didn’t happen. At first I put it off as the holidays. Christmas and New Years was stressful this year, in a good and bad ways. Life was stressful in and of itself. I thought if I could just get through December that I would get a routine back and everything would fall back into place.
Again, that didn’t happen. I found excuse after excuse to not write. I was tired. I had other things to do. I began to wonder if I cared about writing the same way again.
I then began watching the reboot of “Queer Eye” on Netflix. (It is a reboot of the show “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy,” a makeover show from the early 2000s I believe. It was one of my favorite shows back then. The reboot is fantastic!) One of the things they tend to do in that show is talk about creating a place specifically for the guy’s either hobby or way of life. It is usually about creating a space designed for them.
I realized that is what I was missing. In college I had a writing space. I had my set up, that was supposed to be for school work but became where I went to write. It had no distractions. It was about work and a spot for specifically for that and only that.
I did not have that in my apartment. It had a desk but it was used as a trash heap. I had my supplies but they had no home. I wrote on the couch, my back yelling at me. I wrote on the floor but could never get comfortable. Also each of those spots required me to do a lot of set up, a process that I never wanted to do.
So I went out and bought some things to create my writing space. I cleaned off my desk and moved it to a central part of my room. Moved my bed to the side and surround the desk with bookshelves. I found signs with sayings that can inspire me. I bought whiteboards and calendars to keep myself organized.
I transformed my room from a bedroom to a writing space. It has a new purpose now. I have somewhere, where I can sit down and begin to work without a set up process. It has no TV to be distracted by and my cat can easily curl up in my lap as I work without getting in the way.
Is this a magical cure to my block? No, but it is a start. It is a space that can inspire me. It is a space where I can feel like my writing has a home. I can see my progress whenever I walk in the room on my whiteboards. I want to be here and I am excited to see how far I can go now.
Do you have a writing space? How do you push yourself to get writing done around the rest of your life?